End Of Beginning

The title is somewhat sad but yet it hints at the future.The reason I chose this title is because I used to listen to a song called "End Of Beginning" by a singer called Djo on YouTube during my last days at my old home.The song's lyrics resonated with me on a personal level as I was leaving my home of 17 years.
Here's the link to the song if anyone's interested click on "the song" and it'll take you to YouTube

the song 

 As to why this song resonates with me  because within the song the singer talks about the time he is back in Chicago he can feel that another version of him was in it .When I was travelling in the bus while heading home I imagined if this is what it would feel like for me to go back to my city after I have left it? In fact it will feel like it as when I go back there I'll see memories of myself walking down the road of my area. This thought alone had me playing the song on repeat till I left and even now when I go back to give it a listen I get reminded of my old home.

This blog is actually about how I miss my old home even though the title may seem  misleading, it was indeed the End of my beginning .Not a day goes by where I close my eyes and imagine myself in my old room, I imagine my self walking around my room but when I open my eyes  I am left with disappointment and heartbreak. This is what many would call the brutal taste of reality.

During my last two weeks at my house I was somewhat oblivious to the fact that my house was being torn apart for shifting to Dhaka. Furniture were being taken out  of the house for applying  new coats of paint .The clothes were being taken out and being put in bags and luggage .I acted as if everything was going on as the usual day in my house and stayed like this  till the moment .When it was my turn to take my stuff out of my room, which was a day before the move . I had to take off my posters ,plug off my electronics, cancel my services etc .All of this hit me harder than a speeding train and the gravity of the situation started to dawn on me .As I rummaged through my old copies and belongings nostalgia hit me .The memories of my school days ,my college days all came back to me. The days of school that I'll never get back though I wanted to get out  back then,  but now I just want to go back for one day ,share a laugh with my friends ,sadly a man can only wish for so much.
As I put my old copies up for sale it felt as if a part of me was being taken away from me ,a part of my beginning .

After partly clearing my home , I decided to go for a walk in my area ,take in the sights that I grew tired of seeing one last time. Wouldn't hurt, I thought to myself , it was bound hurt .First I walked towards the market . The shops were  same as usual but they felt different ,had a different taste to it if you'd like to put it that way. Next on the list my preschool ,the place where my academic career began ,it was a small school with a small field for assembly and sports. I never liked playing football  there as it was   confining but during the last days at my home , all I could think  was when will I play football in that confining field .I bid farewell to the shops ,to my preschool, to the lanes  where I walked, to the spots where I thought there's peace .I did take photos of the places in the perspective where only I would understand, any other people seeing it will brush it off as something ordinary. Here are the photos (I tried to display them side by side but this site betrayed me :(   )

THE CONFINING FIELD

THE MARKET

I returned to my home and it was time for the Jummah prayer .I went to the mosque for prayer with the thought of this being my last time in this mosque ,the mosque I grew up with .I finished my prayers and went out to see my friends .They were all sad from the looks of it .They were trying to hide it though. I started to talk with them and asked "I last time ya'll?" Usually on Fridays after prayers I invite my friends to my home to play FIFA .We played FIFA like the usual and had a lot of fun. When it was time to go , all of them  said to me "Be well " and hugged me goodbye . These days , there's none of my friends to play FIFA with or share an evening . It feels like something has been taken away out from me .

As the saying goes "You never know the value of a moment till it becomes a memory. "

Well ,that's bit over the limit and I still have a lot more to write about but lets call that a conclusion

I'll forever cherish these memories ,they'll always be a part of me .

You take the man out of the city not the city out the man.

I've waved goodbye to the End Of My Beginning.

PS: If you wanna know how the day ended feel free to approach me .